I stood before him, ready to hate him, and he just looked at me. Everyone expected Chivalry to discharge me the second time. what we might have been in different circumstances. And something like recognition passed between us. I stood there before him and I met his eyes. Almost all his troops were older than I I had expected to confront a middle-aged man. "The first time I was hauled before the Prince, bloody and struggling still, I was shocked to see we were of an age. He said he feared more to stay, feared he could not keep his resolve with you. "Chade said I should leave you tomorrow," he said quietly. He was stealing a slab of bacon at the time." He got up from his chair, and went to his blankets. I suppose I was about eight when he ran between a horse and its cart and was kicked to death. She tried to drive the dog away, but like you, I had a will of my own in those matters. My grandmother, I am sure, had her suspicions. Taking what you wanted, when you wanted it, and not worrying past getting it. His only value was survival, his only loyalty to me. "So I bonded, very young, to the only strong male in my world who was interested in me. Like a dog, or a stallion, I thought it was the only way to establish position with the others. In the first month I was with Chivalry, I was up before him for discipline twice. I didn't meet their standards as a man, let alone as a soldier. I had run out of money and been painfully sober for three days. These were crack troops, his personal guard. I don't know why his sergeant took me on. He'd come to Rippon to settle a boundary dispute between Shoaks and Rippon duchies. Eventually, to become a soldier again, this time for a young prince named Chivalry. Besides, there were scarcely enough animals left in that stable to warrant calling it such. Keeping them alive kept me from killing myself. Neko died, just a day after he started to sicken. "Some kind of horse plague went through that man's stables. Up the coast, to Rippon." He cleared his throat. "Duke Grizzle sold Neko and six mares, and I went with them. He did not need to explain further to me. Or at least, to have the shape of one." Burrich was silent a moment. A mare in season, and the better stallion to have her. Sometimes he put Neko to fight other stallions, as some men fight dogs or cocks for amusement. I had the care of him, but he was not mine. "When the Sandsedge war was done, Duke Grizzle took me home to his own stables. I spoke carefully, fearing to break the spell of calm. "It's too dark for him to be walking," I said to the flames. "Only in the way that people who know one another best know how to hurt one another best," I pleaded. Perhaps Chade could leech some of the poison I'd sprayed at Burrich. Perhaps Burrich could talk Chade into coming back until morning. I felt jealous that they were together while I was alone. What I said to you earlier, I was angry, I was. The fear surged up in me, undercutting my resolve. What I had been snarling for earlier now seemed like an abandonment.
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